Sunday, April 18, 2010

Funny Thing That Happened to Me at Work, Part X

In one of my first/second grade classes, we are reading a story called "Be Careful, Matthew!" Summary: It is about a little boy who's dumbass parents/relatives tell him to be careful with slides/fire/knives, then proceed to be major doofuses and fall/burn/cut themselves. PARENTZ JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND

I like to have my kids do round-robin reading with stories in class to practice speaking. One of my favorite1 seven-year old students, Dennis (yes...Dennis the Menace," aka "The Crier"), really gets into reading--it's his FAVORITE part of class, mostly because it gives him a perfect opportunity to be a major ham/goofball. Usually his way of going about this is to either
a) read really fast/in one breath:
"MomsaidbecarefulMatthewdon'tburnyourself"
or
b) over-enunciate, puffily huffing in between words as if he's just run a mile:
"Mom. Said. Be careful. Matthew. Don't. Burn. Yourself."

The other day in class, it was Dennis's turn to read. He got a really shiffty look in his eyes, and he stood up and walked over to my big chair at the front of the classroom (I normally sit down when the kids read). I asked "Dennis! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" in a super-dramatic voice, anticipating a struggle to get Dennis to sit down again. But Dennis beckoned me closer, and motioned like he wanted to cup his hand around my ear to tell me a secret. I indulged him, for once, and he paused for a second before whispering into my ear..."Be careful...(and then shouting) MADELINE!"

Needless to say, I laughed my ass off. Now, Dennis has taken to substituting random words in the stories we read with MADELINE in an attempt to get a laugh out of me.

Example: "Madeline said, 'Be Careful, Madeline. Don't burn your Madeline'"

I crack up pretty much every time he does it.

1If any teacher ever tells you "I don't have 'favorite' students," they are lying to you.

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